I wish I knew now what I didn't know then!

I guess I'll start at the end and work backwards. Decisions have been made. Although, the process leading up to this point was not easy. Going in, we knew nothing about the whole college application process, let alone the recruiting process. I will always maintain my view that the recruiting process throws a GIANT wrench into what would otherwise be a fairly straightforward experience. While we have decided on a college and accepted the financial aid package, there is still a lot to come our way and I'm sure we will continue to learn as we go. My son ended up applying "Early Decision" to the college he felt was the best fit for him, his major and his wish to play college football. (See link to left for more information on Early Decision) The main thing I wish to tell other parents is that the stress level is high during this time and there is often frustration, worry and impatience. It seems like all you do is wait. These feelings do subside and things do come together. As graduation approaches, we at least know where my son is headed and can focus on other important things and maybe even enjoy the summer some. My son can also spend his last few months at home enjoying his friends and not worrying so much about IF he will be accepted to the college(s) he applied to. There is still a lot to do and fall will be here before we know it, but I must admit..... I'm glad it's over!

Or is it?

All he ever really needed to know, he learned in High School.

Nick attends the Charter school of Wilmington. For those of you who are not familiar with Charter Schools, I have posted a link to the left. The decision to attend a Charter School was one of the best decisions we ever made. This particular school offers college prep courses and AP courses and focuses on math and the sciences. Nick was required to "choice" into this school and admissions required a letter of recommendation, placement testing and an application. His grades have always been excellent and he was admitted for his 9th grade year. The first year was spent making new friends and getting used to the challenging and difficult courses and accompanying homework. He managed to shine his first year and in his sophomore year decided to incorporate sports into the mix. He made the baseball team which did not surprise me because he had always played little league baseball and was a good player. When he announced his plans to play football, I almost fainted. Nick had never even mentioned football growing up and to start that process in the 10th grade was quite an undertaking. At this time, Nick was probably about 6' tall and maybe weighed 200 lbs, so at least he looked like he belonged on that field. I was not sure I liked the idea of him playing with the potential for injury being greater than some other sports, but I have always supported him fully in his decisions and I gave him my blessing. I knew keeping his grades up would not be an issue and the idea of him broadening his horizons seemed like another good reason to support his decision to play. We attended the "Meet the Coaches Night" and were given a lot of information about the philosophy and expectations of the players. We were warned about the practices and that our boys would be pushed far beyond anything they had yet experienced. We were told that many of the players would quit and/or be unable to "hang" and that the kids who stuck with it, would be better for it in the end. The coach had high expectations and strong demands, but the majority of the kids from that night did show up for the first practice. This is where the real story begins.

What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger

I wasn't there, so I don't know first hand how it all happened. All I know is Nick came home that first day in August looking like hell. He seemed off. Quiet. He was physically exhausted but there was something more. After a while he came to talk to me. He always does, we have a great relationship. Nick was upset to say the least. He told me he had had a hard time with some of the practice and had what he thought was an asthma attack. The coaches sat him out to catch his breath and although he did manage to make it through the day, he was shaken by it and very worried about going back and it happening again. He was getting very anxious about it and I believe had a mini panic attack and his breathing became more difficult. I was worried and even considered taking him to the emergency room. He kept saying it scared him and he was scared it would happen again. I asked him what he wanted me to do. Go to the hospital? Call the doctor? Give him permission to quit? He said to me, "Mom, I just want to play." We talked a bit more and he finally calmed down. He decided that what he needed to do was talk to his coach. I decided what I needed to do was check with his doctor and see if this was a normal occurrence as Nick had never shown signs of asthma before. I worried that he was having a physical response to anxiety. We agreed that I would drive in with him the next morning and speak to the coach so that everyone was on the same page. I also was going to make him an appointment with his doctor. Pre-season was not a good time to be missing practice and that was part of his concern. Meeting with the coach was the best thing to do and it gave me an opportunity to explain Nick's position and my expectations regarding his health. The next morning I met Coach Dent. He was in the coaches office when we walked in. I imagine his first thought when he saw me was, "Oh great, a complaint." I guess I would have thought the same thing if a kid's Mom showed up the second day of practice. I introduced myself as Nick's Mom and asked if I could have a minute of his time. He was very receptive to me and invited me in. Nick followed behind, not sure what to think. The first thing I told Coach Dent was that my kid would give him 110%. I told him I was not there to complain or to whine. I fully supported him and the other coaches and was comfortable leaving my son in their hands for the next few months. However, I explained my concerns regarding his "breathing" problem and asked that they be aware of it and if Nick needed a "timeout", that they would grant it without repercussions. I explained my plans to have him see a doctor and I would keep them in the loop. Coach was extremely sensitive and agreed to be aware and flexible with Nick until we got things under control. We made it clear that Nick wanted to play and would play hard. It ended well and I left Nick there to get through another day. We did see the doctor and it turned out that he had Exercise Induced Asthma (see link) and needed a rescue inhaler. For the most part, it helped. Although, there were times when it was more difficult to control and he sounded like a freight train trying to breath, he was dealing with it. Part of the reason, I believe, it hit him so severely the first few times, was because it scared him so much he panicked while it was happening. Knowing that the inhaler would work made a major difference. He was able to trust the inhaler. Pre-season continued and Nick stuck with it. He was excited to be on the team and immediately began bonding with his teammates. They were a good group of kids. Some days were worse than others but for the most part, Nick loved it. He grew a great deal during that time and just like I promised, gave it 110%.